Baby Baby Baby

I've been receiving the most interesting comments, questions, stories, and suggestions. Our receptionist is a sweetheart, but lately, I want to avoid her because the focus of most of our conversations is my pregnancy. One day, I wore a full-blown maternity blouse [the kind that ties in the back]. Unfortunately for her, I was having a bad day--and it wasn't even 9AM yet. She saw me and squealed, "Oh my god! She's wearing a maternity shirt!" I muttered "Yeah yeah yeah" and went into my cube, as I'd just had a difficult meeting with my boss. She didn't get the hint and proceeded to stand at the door to my cube [oblivious to the fact I was facing my computer] and tell me about the hideous maternity clothes from twenty years ago. Somehow, I finally said that it's the attention I don't like, but before I could explain what I meant, she was on to how I should like the attention because once the baby comes no one cares about you!

Friday, she came into my cube and said, "Oh this one time--" and she started laughing with no sound--"I was so out of it when I was pregnant..." and launched into a "pregnant women can be absent minded" story.

When I first revealed that I was expecting, amidst all the usual "Will you find out what it is?" etc., she actually said, "You're not going to name it Art Jr. if it's a boy, are you?" What if I was??

There's a new woman who works for a project in our department. A colleague and I have deemed her a little weird. When someone said to her, "Have you heard the news?" and told her I was expecting, she said, "Oh! What is this, your first, second, third?" Actually, it's my fifth, and I make a big deal every time I'm knocked up because it's a miracle!!

Friday, she heard me describing a colleague's outfit as I mocked it. She hollered over the cubes, "That skill [describing an outfit] will come in handy when your child gets lost playing under the racks at Target or Ross!" Funny, I don't recall mentioning I shop there....

Yesterday, my mom said that one of her cousins from the motherland had sent me advice: "Eat everything so it will be healthy. And don't go on a diet!" Sorry, lady, the US is at least one step ahead of you on that one...who the hell doesn't know that you shouldn't diet when you're pregnant?!?! It's common sense!